I’ve always been a huge fan of magazines, from BMX action bike when I was an 8 year old BMX racer to Jockey Slut the music magazine that declared it was for Disco Pogo For Punks in Pumps. The Face magazine, always by my side during hedonistic uni days. Then came Vice, the free hipster glossy that aimed to represent the London world I was living during my twenties.
Common to most of these magazines (besides most of them going out of print) was a weekly / monthly chart of some sort.
I thought I’d start my own regular dadwithtwokids chart.
“Things that get me frustrated 10″
1. Losing socks – We have a huge pile of odd socks which grows bigger after each wash. It’s taking on a life of its own, I may soon start charging it rent.
2. Toys with pieces, Jig-saws, puzzles etc – Pieces get lost after the first use, therefore pointless toys. Please santa no more.
3. Felt tip pens – tops never put back on, used to draw on anything apart from paper.
4. Apples – One bite then discarded. Half eaten apples found festering all over the place
5. The top coming off babies milk bottle – Milk spillage everywhere. Just love the smell of spilt milk. How can you not cry over it?
6. Watching the same DVD over and over – I now know everyword to the Lion King, Toy Story et al. I dream in Disney.
7. Standing on bits of lego – The most painful thing you can encounter at 3am whilst tip toeing in after a DJ gig.
8. The length of time it takes us to get ready to go out – Being punctual is a thing of the past.
9. Climbing – I’m forever in a state of panic especially when I see Theo balancing one footed on-top of a table.
10. My lack of patience!
Things that make me smile 10.
1. Watching Rose and Theo play together – Their love and bond is strong. Although this will probably change once they hit teenage-hood, then they’ll hate each others guts.
2. Their imagination – So pure and creative, delightful! Rose decorating Theo’s cot with coat-hangers could’ve been exhibited in the Tate Modern.
3. Family hugs on the sofa – What more could you want? Maybe a bigger sofa?
4. When they dance to the beginning of the film ‘Rio’ – Theo giving his blocker boots a good work out. He is the new Lional Blair.
5. Theo speaking Russian – My one year olds favourite (and more or less only) word is a very Russian sounding ‘Neeaat’
6. Seeing the world through your children’s eyes – Unpolluted, happy thoughts. Why not rub play dough in your hair?
7. Rose singing the theme tune to ‘Little Einstein’ – Oh so sweet. But she does get the chorus slightly wrong and her timing could do with a bit of work.
8. Getting woken up in the morning by two little smiles – It’s the only thing that can get a positive repsonse from me in the morning. Once I teach them to make tea it’ll be even more rewarding.
9. Rose’s honesty – ‘Have you wee’d in the bath’, ‘yes’
10. When they are both asleep at the end of the day……..